You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
