saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize