do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
