So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
