someone threw a dead crab at me
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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