What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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