Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
