does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize