i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
