I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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