Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
im holly from the hills drunk
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
