She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize