Christians are straight up FREAKS
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
