I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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