it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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