Nicole vs. Life
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
