Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
