Someone shit on the floor
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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