Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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