By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
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