The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
