A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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