She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
you inspire me to be a worse person
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
