I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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