it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
