This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize