I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
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