dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
i now understand why vodka
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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