well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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