The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
