I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize