you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
