Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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