We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
