First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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