Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
