I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
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