It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it hurts more in the daytime
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize