we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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