i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
