Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize