she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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