not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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