I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
