what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
