Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Is it because I queefed?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
