How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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