You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
