you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
