what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
